The World Mourns

After perusing several of my favorite sites this morning, I turned off the PC. Yes, on purpose. I knew if I didn't, nothing on my list would be accomplished today. We had some friends over for a Sweat Lodge but, because of heavy rain and soggy muddiness outside, we decided to hold a small, quiet prayer ceremony indoors instead. No radio. No TV. No computer. We said goodnight to our guests around 11:00 tonight, and it was only when I logged on at half-past midnight that I learned the Holy Father had passed earlier in the evening. I'm still unsure how I feel about missing the announcement of his passing. Maybe if I had heard at the time, it would feel more "real" to me. As it is, I missed not only the announcement, but all the reporting of the reactions around the world as well.

Alone. That's it. I feel alone. I'm the only one awake at my house right now. Neither the husband nor the daughter have heard the news. There is no one to share this with. No one to sit with. No one to pray with.

I remember when he was elected; the solemn rites of the College of Cardinals being conducted in utter secrecy for the second time in only a matter of weeks. I was 14 when Pope Paul VI died and Pope John Paul I was elected. I remember how strange it was to hear the name "Pope John Paul" during Mass, rather than "Pope Paul." I remember being shocked when he died so quickly afterward. I also remember feeling superstitious and apprehensive when I learned the new Pope was also to take the name John Paul. I was extremely nervous and saw it as a bad omen. How happy I am to have been so wrong.

Pope John Paul II. The only Pope my daughter has ever known. In a few weeks, the College of Cardinals will meet in secret Conclave. The world will wait expectantly - perhaps impatiently. But the process behind the doors cannot be rushed. It may be a short wait or it could take many days. Eventually there will be a new Pope. And, even though my daughter and I don't attend often, it will be strange to hear a new name during Mass.

President Bush has ordered flags to half-staff at federal and military sites. Very fitting. A great man, an inspired leader, a beloved servant of God is gone from us. And, the headlines read, "The World Mourns."

I guess I'm not really alone after all.